Category: Obituary: S

Paul Montgomery Smith-Valley, 76 years, spouse of the Reverend Dr. Judith M. Smith-Valley, died peacefully on May 9, 2017 at his home in Kennebunk ME. Paul was born in Rochester NY, and graduated from the University of Rochester with a bachelor’s degree, after attending Annapolis for 2 years. He completed his service in the Marine Corps Reserves, New York State.

Paul became a consultant and fund-raiser for organizations such as the March of Dimes and the Rochester Philharmonic Orchestra, joining the staff of the Unitarian Universalist Association for over 20 years and consulting in the UUA Building and Loan Program for another 10 years. He had a rare gift for guiding nervous congregations and dealing with cautious lending institutions.

After moving to ME and retiring, Paul Joined the U. S. Coast Guard Auxiliary FLT 24. This brought him back to the sea, boating and a new vocation. He particularly enjoyed the training, search and rescue and teaching safe boating classes. He volunteered extensively, participating in leadership and reaching the rank of CMDO for Northern New England in 2010.

He enjoyed doing crossword puzzles and reading; he was an avid swimmer. He had a small business working with wood and wood-turning and was a member of the West Virginia Wood Turners Association. He adored his grandchildren and enjoyed spending time with his family.

He is survived by his wife; his sons, Dr. Richard Smith, MD and his wife Dr. Barbara Dill, MD of Norwood, NJ, Glenn Valley and his wife Heidi Hermon Valley of Wake Forest, NC; his daughters, Libby Valley Cirillo and her husband Dr. L. Anthony Cirillo, MD of North Kingstown, RI and Susan Woodilla and her husband LTC Tad Woodilla, USAF Ret., of Hermon, ME; his brother Tim Smith and wife Vicki Lee of Pittsford, NY; his sisters, Patricia Williams of Addison, TX and Marcia Joy and husband Ron of Churchville, NY; 13 grandchildren and 1 great-grandchild, and several nieces and nephews.

The Reverend Bob Slater—parish minister, beloved husband and father, student of psychic phenomena—died on 28 April 2017, aged 89.

As a college student, pleasure and skill in ballroom dancing led Bob to support himself with part-time teaching at an Arthur Murray Dance Studio, where he met fellow dance teacher Robin Holzbach. In 1950 Bob took what he deemed “the most important and wonderful step” of his life by marrying Robin. They continued dancing through 65 years of marriage until her death in 2015. (See below.)

Bob pursued a near-lifelong interest in paranormal and psychic phenomena. He was active in the Edgar Cayce Association and was a founding member of the UU Psi Symposium.

Robert Stephen Slater was born on 16 January 1928 in Pasadena, Maryland. After high school, Coast Guard service, and a college degree in 1951, he went on to earn an S.T.B at Harvard Divinity School in 1955. Shorter ministries in Pittsburgh (PA) and Westford (MA) were followed by a call in 1968 to the UU Church of Greater Lynn (MA), where served for 22 years and was named Minister Emeritus in 1990.

For his own obituary, Bob wrote that “all experiences in life offer opportunities for growth in the ways of love of all people and things, that the selfless example of Jesus is the way, and that life is continuous, not ending with the death of the physical body.”

Memorial donations are encouraged to the UU Church of Greater Lynn, earmarked for the restoration and maintenance of their courtyard garden.

Harold “Hal” Victor Sternberg, 87, husband of the Rev. Connie Sternberg, died peacefully in Manchester, CT December 11, 2007, after two years of ill health. Born in Brooklyn, NY, he attended local schools and went on to follow in his father’s line of work in the grocery business. He managed several supermarkets in the New York area. When he retired he was Office Services Manager for Value Line. He was also an avid poker player, who enjoyed gardening. After he retired, he volunteered as a teacher’s aide, focusing on teaching reading and gardening to children and youth. He is survived by his wife, his daughter, Jill and his son.

The Rev. John R. B. Szala, 72, died January 1, 2008 in Plymouth, NH. He was a contemplative monk in a Carmelite Monastery for ten years. After leaving the monastery, he taught school, and then administered a cancer research project at the University of Pittsburgh. In 1972, he first became acquainted with UUism at the First Unitarian Church in Pittsburgh, under the mentorship of Rev. David A. Johnson. Ordained and installed at that church in 1973, he served as their interim minister and as campus chaplain at the University of Pittsburgh and went on to serve churches in Rochester, NY; Salem, MA; and Caribou, ME. He was an active member of the North American Vexillological Association (NAVA), an organization devoted to the scientific study of flag history and symbolism. Survivors include his mother, Julia Szala of Pittsburgh, his brother, and two sisters, and many nieces and nephews.

Claora Bell Styron, 99, widow the Rev. Charles M. Styron, died June 2, 2004 at Medford Leas in Medford, NJ. The Styrons served the First Parish in Lincoln, MA for 33 years. She reared three children and had an active life of her own, teaching public speaking at Boston University and having a private practice in speech therapy. She was an active church member who sang alto in the church choir. She also worked for civil rights. She enjoyed hiking and camping with her family all over North America. In retirement she continued to travel with her husband. He died in 1992. During the last years of her long life her main interests were reading and music. She was a member of the Leas Singers at the time of her death. She is survived by her daughter, Claora E. Styron of San Francisco and her niece, Julie Bell Martin of Wyckoff, NJ.

Janette Browning Foster Storm, 99, widow of the Rev. Carl A. Storm, died peacefully in her sleep on September 14, 2013, in Lynchburg, VA, just 11 days before her 100th birthday.

She was born in Hartford, CT on September 25, 1913 to William and Charlotte Foster. Her mother died when she was in 8th grade and so she became the female head of the house at an early age. She graduated from Stafford Springs High School and attended Pine Manor Junior College, LaSalle College, and Wellesley College.

In 1939, at age 26, she married Carl A. Storm, beginning her lifelong role as a homemaker, who actively supported Carl’s professional life as a UU minister and as a professor of sociology. The Storms served congregations in Exeter, NH; Lincoln, NE; Minneapolis, MN; Schenectady, NY; and Lynchburg, VA. They also took a year’s sabbatical in Edinburgh, Scotland, with Janette seeing to myriad details. She was married to Carl for 57 years, until his death in 1996.

She loved music and was a “phenomenal “cook. She will also be remembered for her wit and her fiercely independent spirit. She was an active member and avid supporter of the League of Women Voters.

She was preceded in death by her son, Jon, and her grandson, Derek. She is survived by her son, Mark, her daughter-in-law, Donna, two grandchildren, and one great grandson, all of the greater Lynchburg area.

Notes of remembrance may be sent to Mark Storm, 211 Ivy West Ct., Forest, VA 24551.

The Rev. Connie Pirnie Sternberg died on May 27, 2012. She was 82 years old. Rev. Sternberg was born in Exeter, NH on November 18, 1929 to James and Harriette (Farrell) Pirnie. Rev. Sternberg attained her Bachelor of Arts degree from Cornell University in 1951. She then went on to earn a Master of Arts from Columbia University Teacher’s College in 1954, and a Master of Divinity from New York Theological Seminary in 1988.

Rev. Sternberg was ordained by the Community Church of New York on May 7, 1989. She was called to the Unitarian Universalist Society: East in East Manchester, CT in 1989, and there, she stayed, until her retirement in 2001. She remained a member of the UU Society: East for the rest of her life.

Her fondest memories of growing up in Exeter, NH included singing in the choir at the Unitarian Church (which she joined as a teenager), and organizing an interfaith youth group which brought Protestant, Catholic and Jewish youth together for socializing and supporting American troops during World War II.

During her time in Manchester, CT, Rev. Sternberg was a leader of the Connecticut Council for Inter-Religious Understanding and was active in many causes, including maintaining the separation of church and state and supporting civil rights for the lesbian and gay community.

Rev. Sternberg met her husband, Hal, in New York City in 1976, and they were married a year later. Hal provided dedicated support throughout her ministerial career, and often said that he loved being “married to the minister.” He died in December, 2007.

In a sermon given on May 9, 2010, Rev. Sternberg spoke of, her final year at the New York Theological Seminary. Her theology professors offered the UU students the opportunity to pick topics other than the traditional Holy Trinity. She and her classmates “refused and tackled the same subjects as the rest of the class.” She went on to say, “Each evening two students were called upon to read their papers. When the topic was the Trinity, there was a loud call: ‘We want to hear from the Unitarians!’ We were both applauded and appreciated. By then, we had all decided that even though our theologies, rituals, and sources of reflection were different, we were in the same business. We were unity in diversity.”

Rev. Sternberg is survived by a step-daughter, Jill Sternberg; a step-son, Carl Sternberg and his wife, Virginia; as well as a grandson, Michael; her brother- in-law Morton Sternberg and his wife Ruth; and her sister-in-law, Marilin Sternberg.

A memorial service was held on June 30, 2012 at 1 p.m. at Unitarian Universalist Society: East, 153 West Vernon St., Manchester, CT 06042. Notes of condolence may be sent to Jill Sternberg, 123 Seventh Ave., Mailbox 251, Brooklyn, NY 11215.

Deborah Lantz Steiner, 103, widow of the Rev. Dr. Richard M. Steiner, died October 27, 2011 in Claremont, CA. She was born into a Quaker family in Pendleton, IN, and attended the George School. When she met and married Dick Steiner he was a Congregationalist who planned to teach religion. His plans changed when the First Unitarian Church Portland (OR) called him in 1934, where he served until 1966. Deborah was the consummate minister’s wife in the “hat and gloves” era. She truly did labor in the vineyards of the church.Active in the Women’s Alliance, the Fortnightly Club and the Greenleaf Club, she also volunteered for many organizations and was a past president of the City Club in Claremont. She was an avid and skilled gardener. Her husband said he owed much of his success to her commitment to their church and his ministry. When he died in 1975 the couple had been married 48 years. She is survived by her sons, Henry-York Steiner, of Spokane, WA and David Elliot Steiner, of Allenspark, CO; their spouses, five grandchildren and 12 great-grandchildren.

Marilyn Shirley Ireland Steeves, 90, widow of the Rev. Addison Eliot Steeves, died June 6, 2010. For 25 years she taught in public and private schools in ME, CA and MA. She wrote the hymn “Heirs of One Faith Are We” when the Unitarian and Universalist women’s organizations merged. She served on the Exterior Committee of the AUA and the General Alliance of Unitarians. She was active with other liberal Christian women leading training for the Sunday School Union of Greater Boston. She was president of the Family Service Association of Dedham, MA and served on the board of directors of the Family Services Association of Greater Boston. She was an accomplished pianist and alto soloist. She enjoyed Elderhostel, the Bowdoin June Seminar, and Bates noonday concerts. Marilyn was a prolific reader all her life and worked as a book reviewer. She loved to knit, to make bread and to collect pewter. She is survived by her three children: Sally, Ellen and Mark Steeves, a daughter-in-law and a son-in-law.

The Rev. Dr. Bob Stebbins, avid traveler, inspiring educator, dedicated family man, and lover of life, died at the Hospice Compassionate Care Center in Richmond, Kentucky, on 17 June 2014, aged 82.

Robert E. Stebbins was born in Lima, Ohio, on 28 July 1931 to Charles F. and Velma J. Stebbins. After graduation from Lima Central High School he earned a B.A. in history from Bowling Green State University (Ohio) in 1953. He received his M.Div. from Yale Divinity School, was forthwith ordained and accepted into the Methodist ministry on 3 June 1956, and continued academic work at the University of Minnesota, earning a Ph.D. in modern European history in 1960. During the first two years of this doctoral work (1956-58), he worked as program secretary and student minister at the University of Minnesota YMCA/YWCA and regularly supplied the pulpit at the Methodist Church in New Richmond, Wisconsin. In 1958-59 he moved on to serve as part-time interim assistant minister at the Mayflower Congregational Church in Minneapolis.

The Rev. Mr. Stebbins was going through much theological searching during these years, and 1959 he withdrew from the Methodist ministry, seeking and receiving Universalist ministerial fellowship the same year. While studying for his Ph.D., he served as the executive director for Tri-U, a Unitarian Universalist student group at the University of Minnesota from 1959 to 1961. Dr. Stebbins taught European history at Eastern Kentucky State College from 1963 until his retirement in 2000.

Bob Stebbins was one of the founders of the Madison County UU Fellowship in 1978, and remained an active member of the congregation for the rest of his life, most often drawing upon his ministerial background as program chair for the lay led congregation.

Robert enjoyed traveling, and explored all seven continents; he followed a ritual of climbing to the highest point of each destination. He was an avid tennis player, and played until the age of seventy-eight. Friends and colleagues recall his “rational perspective” and sense of humor.

Robert’s family members fondly remember his “general delight in living,” and the love he had for his wife and three daughters. His wife, Ann Stebbins, noted, “He encouraged me to reach a potential I did not know I had. He helped me lead a life I did not know I could.”

He is survived by his wife, K. Ann Stebbins; daughters, Susan Stebbins Collins, Beth Ann Stebbins, and Kara Lynn Stebbins; granddaughter Emily Stebbins; grandson Russell Brown; sister Ruth Raines; nephew Blake Raines (Rei-fung Raines) and grand-niece, Karlene Raines.

A Celebration of Life was held on June 21, 2014 at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Madison County, in Richmond, Kentucky.

Notes of condolence may be sent to Ann Stebbins at 208 College View Dr., Richmond, Kentucky 40475.